Rivalitas
by Himonky
Summary: AxS. It has become a trust issue. Asuka was almost honest when she said she loved him. Almost. But will she say it again? Complete.
1. Prologue: And Then?

Rivalitas

Prologue: And then?

* * *

Shinji looked out at all of them, smiling at his good fortune. 'Today,' he thought, 'I have really started to grow up.'

Around him his friends and family congratulated him on accomplishing instrumentality. He shook hands, was patted on the back, and said thank you a million times over. Slowly Shinji came to the realization that this was the happiest day of his entire life.

He finally reached the far side of the room. Shinji turned back to look at everyone, smile upon his face. He looked them all over, as if truly seeing them for the first time. 'I wonder,' he thought, 'whose acceptance I enjoy the most.'

Shinji left the room and headed back to Misato's apartment. Instrumentality had exhausted nearly every nerve in his body. It was time to get some rest.

Back in the room they watched him go with happy eyes. Not a person was unhappy for Shinji right then. Even Rei felt something.

But without the rope that connected them they all broke apart. Shinji kept them together, even if nearly every one of them wouldn't admit it. It was when he was hurt that spirits sunk the lowest, when he was happy that they were at the highest. Without him though…

* * *

Shinji left the next day. He told Misato that he was going to go back up to his teacher's for a few days. Just to see him, to talk to him, and for some free time. His days hadn't exactly been packed since K… the last Angels death. Misato decided he could use a weekend to himself, especially instrumentalized as he was.

Asuka would never have admitted it. At least, not at this point.

Shinji boarded a bus and waved to them, with a smile on his face, as he left. Misato waved goodbye cheerfully. Asuka shouted after him, "Goodbye baka!" Eventually he was out of sight.

"Should we go to the car?" asked Asuka.

Misato paused for a moment. "Yeah," she said, "Let's go to the car."

* * *

Shinji finished unpacking in his old room and lay down on the bed. 'Alright,' he thought, 'what now? I'm at my teacher's for a brief vacation, what to do?'

He headed out for a walk. The cool night air felt relaxing and he enjoyed the feeling of just walking, knowing he wasn't running away from anything. The trail was not paved, which meant it was also relaxing on his feet.

He walked for what seemed like an hour, just rethinking on his time at NERV. It seemed like he'd been doing a lot of that lately. What with instrumentality bringing up every action he'd made at NERV. It was starting to get a little repetitive, at least it seemed that way to Shinji.

Finally the path ended at a lake. The moon was out now, and it cast a reflective light over the whole area. 'Wow,' Shinji thought, 'this is… nice.'

Shinji, in a rare moment of impulse, decided to stay the night out at the lake. He lay down to gaze up at the stars and think about what he wanted to do with his life.

* * *

Asuka slammed the receiver down in frustration. "Stupid baka," she said, "can't answer the phone."

"What's wrong Asuka?" Misato teased, "Miss Shinji already? It's only been one night!"

Asuka scowled and fumed at the jab. Then she straightened and closed her eyes, assuming an explanatory position. "No," she said, "I'm just bored."

Misato's eyes bugged out. She'd heard stories from Shinji….

"Well…" Misato said, glancing at an imaginary watch on her hand, "I think its time for bed." She dashed off for her room, slamming and bolting her door.

Now that just pissed Asuka off more. But eventually she couldn't keep it in. She let out a sigh and plopped down in front of the television. She began flipping channels in boredom.

When she caught what was on one of the news channels she began trying to knock Misato's door down.

* * *

Shinji woke up early. 'One shouldn't expect to be able to sleep late when you're sleeping outside,' he decided when he was roused by a series of bird calls. He yawned, stood, and began the long hike back to his teacher's house.

When he finally did enter the house he found a paper waiting for him on the kitchen table. One glance at the title was all it took for him to flip out. He began frantically trying to call Misato.

* * *

This is a different kind of fic then my last one. Don't expect the real romance to start for at least another chapter. When it does kick off, don't expect it to be great. The thing I like most about this fic is the idea I came up with. You'll find out more next update. 


	2. Photographs

Rivalitis

Chapter 1: Photographs

Asuka put her face against the worn brick wall and cradled it in her arms. 'How could they abandon me?' she thought, 'When I needed them most of all!' Soon she would surely starve to death. Or worse…

FLASH

She turned and leaned her back against the wall now. 'Rei….' She thought. She decided she was not really surprised about her not being able to stand it. 'She always was weak for these kinds of things,' Asuka thought.

FLASH

Asuka sat down against the wall. She leaned against it in a defeated posture. 'But Shinji,' she reminisced. She'd truly expected more from him. He'd only managed to survive it for a couple of weeks. After that, he'd just ran away again.

SNAP

Asuka propped herself up more, in sort of a hopeful way. 'Now,' she thought, 'these shots won't even be worth more then a few thousand.' Not nearly enough to pay for the lavish lifestyle she had become accustomed to recently.

CLICK

"Alright Asuka," said the director, "That's enough for today."

Asuka stood up and reached for the brush an assistant handed her. She walked over to the director of the photo shoot and sat down in a seat next to him. Around her workers began removing the fake settings. The brick wall was rolled up and removed from the glass window it had been covering. "How much?" asked Asuka, slightly hopeful.

"Eight-hundred dollars," said the director, feeling slightly sorry for her. He knew, after looking around her home for only a little while, that she would not be able to survive on that little. At least, not for long, not in this lifestyle.

Famous paintings covered the walls of Asuka's manor. Outside thick forests could be seen in the distance, with a swimming pool much closer. Even closer Asuka's jaw dropped. "Eight-hundred dollars!" she shouted angrily, "The last set was $1,500! That's almost half!"

"I'm sorry Asuka," he apologized, "But already your popularity is starting to wane. It doesn't help you that you've practically saturated the market with your photos."

Asuka was temporarily dumbstruck. 'Saturated the market?' she thought, 'Does that mean… They've seen too much of me?' Her mind could barely wrestle the concept to possibility. After all, how could someone see too much of Asuka?

"I'd suggest getting some help," said the Director, walking towards the exit, "Look, there is still a huge market for pictures of all three of you pilots. Even just you and one of the other's would sell for tons more then just you." He didn't mention that pictures of Shinji and Rei were worth more then anything besides all three of them together.

Asuka closed the door behind him. Finally they were all gone. She plopped down on one of her couches and covered her forehead with her arm. She gazed upwards into the ceiling fan, slowly rotating around above her. The heat in Germany was starting to get to her again; she'd been away from home too long. 'How can I get one of them to help me?' she thought.

'They both abandoned me to this,' she though, 'How am I supposed to make a living now? It's not like I, the second child and child protégée, can just go apply for a job. I'm a celebrity dammit!'

**Seven weeks earlier**

Shinji finally got through to Misato. "Hello?" said a bleary voice on the other end.

"Misato?" Shinji asked calmly. He heard a grunt, which he took to be a positive identification. "What the hell happened?" Shinji lost his entire cool in one instant.

"Huh?" came from the other end.

"Don't you read the paper!" he shouted back.

"Oh," Misato said, "that…"

"Well what about that!" Shinji demanded, more then a little frightened.

Misato's voice changed to a voice Shinji thought she would use if she was being grilled by a reporter, "No details are available at this time. NERV will give a press-conference at a further date. Thank you and good-bye."

"What?" Shinji asked, "What kind of an answer is that!"

"Look Mr. Reporter," Misato began, "I'm not going to sit here and explain everything too you. I've been up way too long for that!"

Shinji was dumfounded. "Mr. Reporter?" he asked, "Misato… how drunk are you? It's me, Shinji."

Misato had to look at the newspaper, sleep deprived as she was, to even start to remember a Shinji Ikari. When Asuka woke her up after the revelations of the pilot's names Misato started drinking. Then the reporter's started calling. Drunk and sleep deprived Misato could barely start to realize that it was Shinji on the other end. "Shinji?" she asked, eyes narrowing in doubt.

"Yes!" he shouted, "It's me, and how the hell did my name get leaked!"

"I dunno," was all Misato managed, "Look, we'll send someone to come pick you up, ok?"

Shinji could only agree. On the other end Misato continued. "Now," she said, "I'm going to bed." She hung up and called Section 2, told them to go pick up the Third Child, removed the phone jack from the wall, and went back to her room to catch up on her sleep.

**Present**

Asuka sighed and rolled over on her couch. 'I have to get one of those two to help me,' she thought. As much as she hated needing to ask for help, she had to do it. 'Maybe I could trick them,' she thought, 'so that I don't have to directly ask for help?'

Her mind began creating conversations. She spent the better part of the next hour coming up with different ways to try to ask for help, without actually asking for help. However, even Asuka had to eventually admit that none of them would work. Rei and Shinji might be stupid, but they weren't dumb. Or were they dumb but not stupid?

It didn't matter. She began trying ways to ask for help directly. Ideas of that were thrown out faster then the not asking for help had been. It was all starting to feel depressing.

'What about some kind of big news making event?' she thought. That might raise the dollar amount on her pictures, and better her prestige. Ideas coursed through her head. But what made big news in the celebrity world?

Acting stupid, sex tapes, retarded ramblings, strange dresses, divorces, drunken driving, and acting like you knew something, drugs, excessive partying, and a music career, acting, and… dating.

'Am I willing to do that?' she thought. It wouldn't hurt… and at the very least she'd get to see Shinji again. Ideas began to take specific shapes. Some where even actually thought out.

**Finish Chapter 2**

For some reason the divider on fanfiction isn't working. Hope everyone can sort it out.

Wow! Seven reviews for one chapter? That beats the shit out of what I had my last story. I never even had five in the same chapter for it. Glad to hear from anyone willing to write about this.

Original or bust.


	3. Paparazzi

Rivalitas

Chapter 2: Paparazzi

It was an awkward call, but she decided she had to make it.

His phone rang and he walked over to the stand to pick it up. When he glanced at the caller ID his heart froze.

Soryu, Asuka

That was all he had to read off of it. 'Oh shit,' he thought. He reached for the phone slowly. When he answered it he was more then half-expecting to have his ear blown off.

He was right, but for the wrong reasons. "Shinji?" came across in a sweet tone. It didn't register in his head for a moment. He un-tensed and blinked in surprise.

"Yeah," he said, "Is this Asuka?"

"Oh!" still in the sweet tone, "You recognized my voice, and after so long!"

Expecting her sarcasm to become more obvious any moment he returned, "It's only been a few weeks."

"But it feels like forever!" Asuka said on the other end. This was working fine so far, she had Shinji confused. That was what was really important; keep him guessing so that he wouldn't be able to think about it.

"I guess," he said.

"We need to get together some time!" she said, "It's a crime that we haven't seen each other for so long."

"Well it is kind of hard," Shinji said, "Seeing as you've moved back to Germany. What time is it there anyway?"

There was a pause on the other end. "Close to one," Asuka said slowly.

It was around nightfall where Shinji was. Therefore Asuka must have meant close to one in the morning. Therefore she wouldn't have called just to talk. "Can you not sleep or something?" he asked.

"Sort of," Asuka said, "I just sort of decided I really needed to talk to you."

The silence that followed was an awkward one, at least from his end. Shinji's mind blanched out for a moment. 'Asuka needed to talk to me?' he struggled to think. The part "Asuka needed" was especially confusing to his mind.

Although Shinji was not exactly acting it, he'd missed Asuka quite a bit. In fact, he was missing nearly everyone from the old days. It seemed strange to him to think back to NERV as the good times. If NERV had ever been anything, it hadn't been good times.

Finally he managed to talk, "You needed to talk to me?" he stuttered. His mind was still trying to grasp the implications. His body was already hoping for one possibility though…

"Yeah," she said, "But I guess if you're too busy…" she trailed off.

Shinji closed the gap quickly. "No, I'm fine for talking," he said in a rush.

"Oh," Asuka said, still feigning innocence, "Then could you maybe come to Germany for say, dinner and maybe a movie?"

Shinji gaped openly. That sounded a bit like a date to him, although part of him knew that was impossible. 'No,' it said, 'Asuka would never date me.'

"Well, baka?" Asuka said, growing irritated, "Can you come to the date or not?"

Because of his jaw's position Shinji could not speak. Part of his mind managed to think. It threw a coupe and took over the rest of his mind, captured the speech control part of his brain, and managed to make a positive sounding grunt.

"Great!" Asuka said, exhilarated from the other end, "You can, of course, get plane tickets?"

Shinji's mind began to settle, now numb to shock. He didn't think Asuka could say anything more surprising then that. Well, maybe a few things, but those would surely never happen. "Yeah," he stumbled out, "I'm sure NERV can get me tickets. I'll just pass it off as something. Ever since our names got leaked father's been willing to do almost anything."

"Great!" Asuka said, her voice filled with sweetness, "Tomorrow night sound good?"

"Sure," said Shinji, "That should let me get over jet-lag."

The call sank into planning's for the…date.

**Two Nights Later**

So, two nights later, they met at a restaurant Asuka had specified. Shinji was over his jet-lag, over most of his confusion, and ready for what promised to be an interesting night.

It was one hell of a nice restaurant. "Fitting for our celebrity status" as Asuka had said on the phone. 'Fitting for one hell of a bill,' Shinji thought. Already, just looking at the place waiting for Asuka, his wallet was crying out in mortal agony.

Shinji had received a modest payroll from selling pictures, like Asuka, but had become overcome by the attention. Needless to say, the pressure had gotten to him rather quickly. The only reason he had much money at all was because his shoots were sold for much more then Asuka's.

He wore a suit he'd gotten a few weeks ago. After the names had leaked and it had become obvious people would recognize him on the street Misato had decided he needed a suit. She'd gotten him this one and he'd since repaid her in full.

Shinji waited for Asuka to come. He waited across the street from the restaurant, looking around for his friend. A limo pulled up in front of the restaurant. Shinji paid it little mind.

The limo pulled away to reveal Asuka, walking towards the restaurant. Shinji blinked, surprised that his friend had gone to such expensive lengths. He hurried across the street, shouting out to Asuka. "Hey!" he said in a louder voice, "Asuka, wait!"

She turned around and looked at him as he hurried across the street. 'As always,' she thought with a sigh. She calmed herself and struck a slight pose. When he looked at her she wanted him to gape. That would definitely help her plan.

Shinji reached her and managed to not immediately look her over. He didn't want her to get annoyed for him ogling her. Especially in public. "Hi," he said, slightly breathless from the run.

Asuka managed to not scowl at him. He hadn't even looked at her. 'Maybe that won't work,' she thought. She returned his smile and said, "Hi!"

She hugged him.

Shinji's eyes popped. Asuka released the hug and beckoned for him to follow her into the restaurant. 'This might be worth the dinner price tag,' Shinji hazarded.

They where seated promptly in the corner. The waiter looked down at his list and smiled when he saw their names. The establishment he worked at seated celebrities often, it was just that these two where some of the biggest celebrities in recent weeks. He managed to conceal his excitement at seating the world's saviors. After seating them he hurried off to the back, intending to make a phone call…

Shinji pulled back Asuka's seat for her before taking his own seat. "Shinji!" she said with a fake smile, "I never knew you were such a gentlemen!"

Shinji didn't catch the fake smile at all. He looked down at his hands and began to sweat. 'A compliment,' he thought, 'from Asuka?'

Asuka decided that it wouldn't work to have Shinji stare at his hands the whole time. "So," she began, "how's Japan been?"

Shinji looked up and momentarily froze. For the first time he'd gotten a good look at Asuka. "Fine," he said, "How's Germany?"

Asuka made an inner smile before responding. She gestured around. "Well, as you can see, it's great!" she said, "I'm so glad to be back to the motherland."

Shinji nodded, "So, what have you been up to?"

"Living the high life," she said with a real smile now, "It's great to be in the spotlight."

"Yeah," Shinji agreed, "It does seem sort of perfect for you."

Asuka blushed slightly at the compliment. Internally she reprimanded herself, 'Don't lose control! Remember, you have to convince him to stay here and help you out.' "I haven't heard much about you lately," she said, forcing control.

"Yeah," Shinji said, "Well, you see I've sort of retired from the limelight."

Asuka already knew it. She absolutely knew it. "But why?" she asked.

Now Shinji faced a problem. Use the truth, that he didn't like all the attention, and risk Asuka returning to being a bitch, or lie, which she would almost surely see through. "I just," he paused for a moment, "I sort of freaked out after a couple events," he finished.

They where interrupted by the waiter coming to take their order. Neither had looked over the menu much, Shinji couldn't even read it, but Asuka still knew what she wanted. She took the liberty of ordering for Shinji as well.

"So," she began again, "You freaked out?"

"Yeah," he said, "I think I just wasn't ready for that kind of attention. I only managed to survive it as long as I did because you where still in Japan then. When you moved away well, that kind of threw me for a loop. Suddenly my support was just gone."

'Bingo,' Asuka thought. "Oh!" she said, "I didn't realize that I'd just left you like that." She feigned being sorry perfectly. A small piece of her brain accepted the information in a different way.

Shinji scratched the back of his head uncomfortably. He hadn't wanted to come here and accuse her of ditching him, far from it. At the time he'd been happy that he wouldn't have to stay in the spotlight anymore. Of course, that wasn't to say that he'd wished Asuka had moved, far from that as well.

"It wasn't really a problem," he said.

"No no no!" Asuka exclaimed, "I can't believe that I just left you without any help. Shinji," she reached for his hand on the table. She found it and held it. Shinji's eyes locked onto where his hand was covered. "I can't believe that I just made you lose everything like that!"

Shinji's mind reached, reached, and finally made the catch. 'This is exactly what I wanted to avoid,' he thought. "Uh," he tried to begin.

"I mean," Asuka interrupted, "If I'd known that my leaving would make you-"

It began.

Shinji's mind screamed in unhappiness. Here they where again, in a different country, being shot at. Old memories began to surface. Bad memories of being under fire just like this.

'Yes!' Asuka thought. The pose was perfect. Her holding Shinji's hands, him looking at her hands. It almost couldn't have been better, at least not in the restaurant.

Outside, through the window, the paparazzi had begun taking shots. Flashes came through the windows, only occasionally stopped by the hurried sound of switching rolls of film. The subjects where in a million dollar shot pose.

Shinji stood up angrily. Asuka followed him as they crossed out of the corner and towards the main door. 'No way am I paying for dinner at a restaurant that'll allow this,' Shinji thought.

Behind him Asuka was barely concealing her happiness. 'Perfect!' she thought, 'They couldn't possibly have showed up at a better time.

Shinji pushed the door open and stepped outside. He stopped. Asuka walked around him so that she could see what was on the other side. They both stared in disbelief.

Camera-men crowded the exit. Had it been dark enough to warrant flash here both Shinji and Asuka would've gone blind. Shinji's pose was good. Unintentionally he'd made a defiant sort of position. Asuka, next to him, struck a similar pose. United was exactly what the camera-men wanted.

Scowling, Shinji turned and pulled Asuka back into the restaurant. "Can you call your limo?" he asked, angry at their nice dinner being interrupted. 'Just when we where going to get to the important stuff,' he thought.

Asuka nodded, enthralled at the possibility of Shinji pulling her into the limo, saving her from the horde of pictures. 'That's just perfect!' she thought, 'That'll start all sorts of rumors of us dating! Which we'll of course deny, making more controversy.' It all worked in her book. "Yeah," she said, "I can call it."

"Good," Shinji said, turning towards the back of the restaurant, "Then I'm going to slip out the back door. See you later."

Asuka lunged and managed to catch his arm. Shinji turned back to face her. Outside the paparazzi hooted in happiness, it just kept getting better and better. Asuka and Shinji looked each other in the eyes for a long moment before Asuka spoke again. "But where will you go?" she asked.

"Back to Japan," Shinji said, slightly dumfounded.

"Already?" Asuka asked, "But you only just got here!" She pouted slightly.

"Well…" Shinji said, slightly confused, "Where else am I going to go?"

"You can stay with me," she said.

Blood both rushed and drained from Shinji's face. Half of him was horrified by the prospect, who knew what Asuka would do to him? Another aspect was excited at the possibility. "I dunno," he hesitated.

"Come on," Asuka pushed, "It'll give us a chance to talk more!"

Shinji's mind finally settled. "Fine," he said, "Call your limo."

She did. While she did Shinji's mind shifted around. 'She wouldn't want to do that,' he thought, 'of course not.' He firmly decided that she wouldn't. After all, she had always called him perverted. 'You're just proving her right,' he thought. He managed to force the thoughts to stop.

Asuka turned back to him just as the limo pulled up. On the other side of the wall of paparazzi. 'Oh shit,' Shinji thought.

Asuka began walking outside, gesturing for him too follow. Shinji obliged her.

To Shinji's happiness and surprise the paparazzi parted for them to reach the limo. Asuka opened the door and climbed in. Shinji scurried in after her.

'This is going to be a long night,' he decided.

**Finish Chapter 2**

Dividers are still not working. Anyone else having this problem, or just me?

I've decided this will be a pretty short fic. Expect 7 chapters, at least that's what I'm planning. Could grow I suppose. All well, too early to worry about that yet.

Glad to hear from anyone who wants to review this. That means you.


	4. Heartfelt Considerations

Rivalitas

Chapter 3: Heartfelt Considerations

------

The limo took them out of town at an astonishing pace. Apparently Asuka's driver was used to having to outrun cars full of ravenous paparazzi. Asuka sure didn't act like it was anything out of the ordinary.

"Don't worry," she said in a teasing sort of way, "I have a guest bedroom."

Shinji let out a sigh of relief and glanced out of the back of the limo. The paparazzi were not keeping up and were quickly being left behind. "You've got a good driver," Shinji speculated.

"He's the best," Asuka replied, "Used to be a soldier. Plus he doubles as a bouncer in a pinch. And he's loyal as well." At least she hoped. When he saw how little she would be able to pay him he'd have to be.

"I don't want to impose," Shinji said politely.

Asuka shook her head and waved him off. "No," she said, "To be honest with you it gets lonely when it's just me. Having you here will make it a lot more interesting, I'm sure."

"OK," Shinji said. He really didn't want to intrude, but if it meant he got to see more of Asuka it was worth it.

At this point there was no question in Shinji's mind that Asuka was acting different. He had yet to be badly insulted or embarrassed. Better, and stranger, yet he had been complimented by her. By the great Asuka Langley Soryu!

"I can't wait to see the house," Shinji said, politely feigning interest.

"I can't wait to show it to you," Asuka said, smiling.

Finally the limousine pulled into a driveway on the outskirts of Berlin. Asuka and Shinji got out of the limo and Shinji looked the house over.

It was pretty big. It had a three car garage, pool, walls, and a large house. 'Not the biggest,' Shinji thought, 'But big enough.' He decided Asuka would've liked it to be bigger. "Nice house," he admired.

"Yeah," she said half-heartedly, "But I would've liked it bigger."

Shinji cocked a small smile and followed Asuka up the front steps. She closed the door behind him and they entered the entrance hall. Asuka began giving him the full tour.

------

Finally Shinji was left alone to enter the guest room. He left the lights on, expecting to leave the room after getting cleaned up a little. Sweat from the paparazzi experience covered his face and he decided he needed a shower. He stripped down and jumped in.

He made sure to lock the door.

Shinji let the hot water run over his body as he began to review the night's events. 'OK,' he thought, 'Dinner at a nice restaurant, get seated, talk, order food, paparazzi shows up, run out, get in limo, and I'm now staying at Asuka's. Yeah, that pretty much sums it up,'

His thoughts began to drift towards what he and Asuka had talked about. The discussion had been mostly about what had happened to them recently he realized. 'That's good,' he thought, 'we didn't even have to bring NERV or piloting up once.'

Upon further thinking Shinji realized that they hadn't talked about much else. 'Oh well,' he thought, 'more for later.'

Next his thoughts went to the repercussions for being seen like that. Pictures would show up in all the magazines, of course, and some celebrity news shows would report on it. 'Oh well,' he thought, 'its not like we are meeting secretly or anything.'

His mind sunk when he realized that was exactly what had happened. Worse, they'd been holding hands when it all started. "Jesus," he said aloud, "They're going to think we're a couple!"

'Is that really that bad?' a piece of him thought.

He considered it for a moment before answering himself. 'It wouldn't be bad if we were a couple,' he thought, 'but even then I wouldn't want everyone to know about it.'

The big problem, he decided, was that they weren't even actually dating. All of this would be reported around the world, only to later be denied by Asuka. Even if Shinji desperately wanted it to be true, Asuka would never accept it.

'Or would she?' he thought. She had seemed different…But that different?

Shinji figured it out in his head calmly. 'Even if Asuka would accept it,' he thought, 'I wouldn't want it to be publicized.'

'What if she wanted it to be publicized?' the little voice in his head thought.

'She wouldn't,' he argued, 'Asuka isn't like that.'

'Are you sure? As you said, she has changed.'

No response for a moment then a decisive ending to the battle. 'She isn't like that,' he thought.

Shinji now turned to what to do next. 'Deny it? Try to make it real? Ignore it?' he thought. It was no easy decision, especially without vertabrae.

------

Asuka was laying on one of her couches in her living room thinking about the night's events as well. Just in a very different way.

'Alright,' she thought, 'I'm doing well. Why, after that a set of just me will go way up! The media will be craving for my attention now!' Thoughts of interviews and autographs began to dance in her head.

Still, Asuka couldn't help but worry a little about Shinji. He was liable to be hurt by this, weak as he was. Especially weak as he was. Already she felt a little sorry for him…

She pushed the feeling aside. 'Get a grip Asuka,' she thought, 'It isn't like you love him or anything!'

Internally she went on to decide that Shinji wasn't worth her pity, time, and most especially her love. There was no way the baka deserved any of that from her.

Groveling at her feet… maybe he deserved that.

------

Shinji got out of the shower and began toweling himself off. Soon he was getting dressed.

He'd made up his mind. He was going to go ask Asuka out. For real. No joke.

All he could hope was that she would not laugh.

'If she says yes,' he decided, 'then neither of us will have to put up with that dam paparazzi ever again.'

------

In the living room Asuka fluffed pillows and straightened everything up.

She'd made up her mind. If Shinji wouldn't ask her out then Asuka would ask him out.

He would of course way yes.

'When he says yes,' she thought, 'my place in the spotlight will be assured forever!'

------

Still no dividers. That's getting annoying.

I have a reccomendation for the next chapter. Before, during, or after you read it listen/read the lyrics to Almost Honest by Megadeth. I think that's where this storyline is sort of coming from.

Thanks to all the reviewers. I already have more then half as many reviews as my first story has gotten. And that's only in 2 chapters and a prologue! Update will be soon, count on it.


	5. Almost Honest

Rivalitas

Recommendations: Get Almost Honest by Megadeth. Listen to it while you read this, or read the lyrics before or after reading it. This story is heavily influenced by the song. Think of it as a guide.

Chapter 4: Almost Honest

------

Shinji smoothed the wrinkles out of his suit. He looked himself over in the mirror and decided he was satisfied. He turned and began steadily walking towards the door. 'Come on Shinji,' he thought, 'you can do this.'

His mind was set. It wanted to be with Asuka, but without the spotlight on both of them. A large piece of him had decided that he wanted to be with Asuka.

However one of the smaller pieces was much further ahead then that. This particular piece was deciding that it was in love. It wanted to be with Asuka because it knew that would make them both happy.

Like HIV the small piece began to systematically take over the rest of the mind. Ever slowly gaining more control.

Shinji found that his feet had delivered him to the living room. His eyes swept over the room, noticing just one thing. Asuka was seated on one of the couches. Shinji continued to stand, waiting awkwardly.

"Well?" Asuka said, "Are you just going to stand there or sit down?"

Shinji hurried to comply. He found a seat on another couch, across from the one Asuka was seated on. Shinji sat forward, so that his back was not touching the couch. He wanted to be very clear about this talk.

"Asuka," he began, "I…"

An older piece of Shinji kicked in, stalling him momentarily.

"Was there something you wanted to tell me Shinji?" asked Asuka.

"No," Shinji said, "It was really more of a question."

Asuka, beginning to realize that she might not have to ask Shinji herself, said, "What kind of question?"

Thrown off balance by Asuka's repeated questions Shinji had to pause a second to think about it. "Um…An important one," Shinji said hesitantly.

Asuka leaned forward in her seat. "What kind of an important one?" she asked.

"Well, you see," Shinji began. He stopped again. He faced forward and looked into Asuka's eyes. "I want to know if you'll go out with me," he sa-

Asuka jumped up, grabbed him, and hugged him. "Shinji!" she said, "I'm so glad you finally asked."

Shinji's mind was dangerously close to exploding. That wasn't all. 'Is this really Asuka accepting this?' he thought. "Uh, so am I?" was all he could say.

Asuka didn't notice that he'd said it like a question. "This is such a great day for both of us," she said, excited.

Shinji managed to break free from Asuka's tight grasp. They both stood there, holding each other loosely.

Remember the little part of Shinji from earlier? Well that HIV spread pretty fast.

"Asuka," he said, "I think… I think I love you."

She was dumfounded. A little bit of her said 'Score! Bonus points,' while another, much deeper part said 'uh oh.' Her mind began to think of these repercussions. While her mind worked it out her mouth did what it did best. Go.

"I think I love you too Shinji," she said quickly, mind still struggling to ask the question, let alone give an answer. 'Do I?' she thought.

'Of course not,' another part said, 'but we sure could use his love for gain.'

'But do I really want to?' the first returned, 'That seems cruel.'

'Are we still sure we don't love him?' interrupted a third piece.

While Asuka was thinking Shinji was already through with considering her latest words. 'She loves me too,' he believed.

"This is great Asuka," he said, breathing heavily. 'I love her and she loves me back!' he thought.

Asuka gave a smile, brain still vacantly considering her "morals". What Shinji said next would completely stop her train of thought in a crash.

"Why, now we can both stop having to deal with the paparazzi all the time too!" Shinji said.

Asuka blinked and the smile faded in confusion. Shinji failed to notice. "Yeah," he said, considering the future with an all new approach. Optimism. "Neither of us will have to be hunted by them, or even sell pictures anymore," he said with a great smile.

Asuka's mind began to collect itself. "You mean," she said slowly, "that you won't go out with me while the limelight is still on?"

Shinji continued to smile, but now he noticed that Asuka was not smiling. "Well," he said, "neither of us needs it anymore. We've got each other!"

Asuka shook her head calmly. "What about money Shinji? What about attention?" she demanded.

Shinji's smile faded slowly. "Attention?" he asked.

"Yes Shinji," Asuka said in a tone that she would've used with a toddler, explaining to it why the sky was blue, "attention. You know, people wondering about you? Wanting to know all about your life?"

"But-," Shinji tried to begin, but he was cut off.

"No Shinji," Asuka demanded, "I can not live without attention!" She said the words in a drawn out way, pointing her finger at Shinji's chest and pushing him backwards with each syllable. "The attention stays or I go," she said, "got it?"

Shinji found himself pushed back so he couldn't hold Asuka anymore. His mind struggled with everything. 'Her with the paparazzi or nothing?' the main piece thought.

'What the hell!' another piece shouted, 'She said she loved you! If she loved you she'd give it up for you.'

'But shouldn't I be willing to live with the paparazzi for her?' asked another part.

'Our love of her isn't being doubted here,' the main piece cried, 'It's hers that we can't know is real.'

Slowly all the pieces of Shinji heard it. What he'd tried to say to Asuka, before she'd interrupted him. "But we'll have each other for attention," he'd tried to tell her.

'She didn't care,' all the pieces decided, 'We won't be enough for her.'

'She lied,' the main piece sobbed.

Shinji turned and, without a word, began walking towards the door. "Where are you going?" Asuka shouted after him, "Shinji you will listen to me when I'm talking to you!"

'See how she likes being ignored,' Shinji thought. He closed the door gently behind him.

------

Asuka fumed. 'He just left me!' she thought.

'What? Didn't give him enough reason to leave?' fired back sarcastically.

'Why would he leave? If he really loved me he'd have stayed and put up with the paparazzi for me!' there was venom in this one's voice.

'Maybe,' came back, 'but you didn't exactly make it seem, shall we say, sincere.'

'What do you mean? I was the perfect lady telling him that!'

'Me and the fame or nothing? Why didn't you just rip out his heart and tell him that he would never be enough for you? At least then you wouldn't have gotten his hopes up like that.'

'Well who cares? Its not like I love him for real or anything.'

'I think we care or we wouldn't be having this conversation.'

Asuka collapsed onto the ground, the truthfulness of her own thoughts weighing her down. "Oh Shinji," she cried, "What have I done? Why did I have to hurt you like that?"

Her tears began to fall. One of the sharpest minds of humanity, ever, began to search for a way out of this. 'Apologize!' it shouted.

'Why? I hurt him bad,' she thought, 'and I don't even love him.'

'Bullshit,' was her reply.

------

Her thoughts drifted back before the fame, when Shinji had gone to his teacher's. Her mind dwelt on how she had missed him, even after just one night. The memory was vivid. She could remember exactly how disappointed she'd been when Shinji had not answered his phone.

Later, when Shinji had been retrieved by Section 2 he'd seen the missed call on his phone. He'd asked Asuka about it.

She'd been unwilling to admit it was her, that she had missed him after just one night; she'd told him it must have been Misato. He'd just accepted it, naive as he was.

------

Asuka had gotten away with that without any repercussions; maybe that was why she'd thought she could get away with this. The last time had made her overconfident, something instrumentality had tried to teach her not too do.

Now what was she to do?

'I can't just let it end like this,' she thought, 'I have to find Shinji and apologize. Love him or not, I need time with him to make up my mind.'

She rushed out the front door of her house, eyes searching frantically for any signs of where Shinji had gone. After what seemed like an eternity she found his footprints, leading north of her house. Asuka began hurriedly following them.

'Shinji,' she thought, 'I think I do like you. Maybe we can work something out. Maybe… I can learn to love you.'

Even in her nice dress Asuka managed to follow the tracks at a good pace. It didn't hurt that her heart was practically pulling her in the right direction.

His tracks went on for a long time.

Finally she reached the end of them. Her eyes bulged with disbelief.

Apparently Shinji had gotten a ride. Three wheel tracks started at where his footprints ended. Asuka began following them tiredly.

The tracks stopped not much further away. 'They can't just stop,' she thought, 'How could a car just vanish into thin air?'

Then it hit her, it wasn't a car. Shinji had been picked up by a small plane. 'He is going back to Japan,' she thought weakly.

Slowly she began to head back to her home. Her pace was much slower now. Her mind did not think, it was too close to exhaustion for that.

------

Lack of dividers is getting annoying.

Yeah, this chapter is definately influenced by Almost Honest. If you read the lyrics or heard the song but don't understand it let me know. I can give you a good site that has the interpretation I got.

Reviews continue to pour in. Its great to hear from anyone, whether you've reviewed this before or not. Thanks to everyone who has.


	6. Insurrections Interconnections

Rivalitas

Chapter 5: Insurrections/Interconnections

------

Asuka collapsed into her bed. Her head swam, before she eventually fell asleep.

She dreamed of instrumentality. All of the lessons she'd learned during it were replayed in front of her. Like when it happened in reality it seemed to go on forever, with no end in sight.

But eventually it became different. Just as everyone gathered around her to congratulate her for succeeding in the instrumentality, the dream became a nightmare.

Her friends gathered around her and, instead of praising her, began to yell at her. She was told that she would never learn any of the lessons, despite the fact that she'd just endured them for what seemed like several hours. Misato told her that she would never be welcome in her home again. Hikari told her that she hated her and that they where never friends, just like she had never loved Shinji.

Asuka's protests where drowned out in a sea of yelling. No one would listen to her, one of her deepest fears. If they hadn't all been yelling at her they'd have been ignoring her.

Like Shinji was.

He just stood there, apart from the others, back facing her. Once Asuka managed to look past the others and see him he began to leave the room. He walked out the door, without a word.

It hurt Asuka's mind.

She awoke in a cold sweat, every pore screaming for freedom from the sheets. Asuka obeyed them, rolling out of bed quickly. She hit the ground hard.

Asuka let out a groan and began to massage her back. 'That hurt,' she thought.

'Not as much as you hurt him,' drifted through her mind. She winced at a more internal pain.

With what seemed like a crash Asuka remembered the last night's events. She looked down at her hands and wept into them, remembering how she had tried to use Shinji.

She wept for awhile.

Slowly the weeping began to slow down. 'Shinji,' Asuka thought, 'I was wrong. You aren't one to be used; you aren't as weak as I thought you were.'

The weeping increased.

Eventually there was nothing left to weep. Asuka struggled into the shower and began to wash herself. She let the water pour onto her face and hair, removing the obvious signs of crying from her body.

The shower couldn't last forever though. Asuka shut off the water and allowed water to drip off of her before she stepped out. She reached for a towel and dried herself completely.

Returning to her room she proceeded to dress and prepare for whatever the day brought. She'd long since decided to try to get a hold of Shinji. 'I have to apologize,' she thought, 'at the very least.'

This was not to say that she didn't want more, she just didn't expect it.

As she did up the buttons on her dress she calculated the time in Japan. Shinji would almost definitely be back by now. Asuka realized that she had slept for a long time; the sun was past its zenith already.

'I might as well call now,' she decided, 'otherwise I'll go insane from the waiting.'

She picked up her phone and summoned Shinji's number on the caller ID. As she placed the phone to her ear she heard it begin to ring.

Shinji did not answer. Asuka momentarily collapsed. 'Maybe he won't talk to me,' she thought.

'Damn it!' she thought, pushing herself up, 'I'm going to get a hold of him if I have to go to Japan myself.'

The more she thought about it the better it sounded. 'After all,' she thought, 'an apology means much more in person. And even more if you go across two oceans to give it.'

Mission number one became getting transportation. She went to her dresser and pulled out what remained of her money. The answer was in the negative. 'Not enough money for a plane,' she thought.

But how had Shinji gotten to Berlin? He'd said his father had been willing to do almost anything for them since the pilots' names had been leaked. Couldn't Asuka get the same sort of transportation Shinji had used?

But who should she call for that? It wasn't like Asuka was important enough to have Commander Ikari's personnel phone number. She'd need to be able to destroy NERV to have that sort of power. Hell, Shinji must only have had it because it was his father.

That left Misato.

Who would almost definitely have been called by Shinji already. 'Oh boy,' Asuka thought, 'this is going to be a hard one.'

She keyed in the number, lowered the volume to its lowest setting and pressed call. It rang once.

"How dare you treat him like that!" Misato screeched into the phone. Asuka nearly fell off her bed. She hadn't even heard Misato answer the phone. "And then you just call me like this!" Misato continued.

"Misato! Wait, I can explain," Asuka tried to say.

"Explain!" Misato shouted, "Explain how you said you loved him and then contradicted yourself? You're a smart girl Asuka. You wouldn't just say something you mean without a purpose!"

"I did have a purpose," she started.

"What? To get more attention from the magazines? What sort of purpose is that?"

"It only started as that," Asuka tried to explain.

"And then turned into what?" Misato demanded, "Using him for something else? You told him that his attention wasn't enough for you!"

"I did not!" Asuka said, truly believing that she hadn't.

"Well then why the hell did Shinji and I need to have a three-hour conversation, in the middle of the night, about how you'd said that? I think I believe him more then you Asuka! Never even try to come into my house again!"

Asuka heard Misato slam the phone down on the other end. 'Why?' Asuka thought, 'She didn't even give me a chance to talk.'

She collapsed onto the ground, intent on crying again. But before she could the phone rang.

Puffy-eyed and sniveling, Asuka reached for the phone and answered it. Moments later she wished she'd checked the caller ID first.

"Pilot Soryu?" drifted across the phone line.

"Rei?" she asked uneasily.

"I take," Rei said, "from Major Katsuragi's yelling you called her?"

"Yes," Asuka pouted slightly.

"I believe I can help you," Rei said.

Asuka's eyes bulged in astonishment.

------

Damn dividers.

As far as I'm concerned I've gotten a lot of reviews for this. In just the first five chapters I've gotten more reviews then my first story had in 24. Thanks go out to anyone who reads this, most especially those that review it.

At this point I have just a few more chapters planned. However, due to the high amount of reviews I'm considering extending it. Let me know what you think.


	7. Tête à tête

Rivalitas

Chapter 6: tête-à-tête

------

Rei got Asuka transportation and in only a few hours they where meeting.

Rei herself was not at the airport. But there was a bald man with a sign that had Soryu written on it. Asuka approached him calmly, carrying only her carry-on. "You here for me?" she asked the man. He nodded. "Fine," Asuka said, "You want to put that sign away? I am famous you know. And get my bags."

The man shook his head. "She said you'd want me to carry your bags. I've been told not too," he said with a sneer, "I'm also to carry this sign above my head the entire way to the car."

Several things struck Asuka at once. 1 she had to carry her own bags. 2 the guy was already lifting the sign up. 3 he'd said car not limo. She frowned and turned to go pick up her bags.

'Damn Wundergirl,' thought Asuka, 'if you don't know where Shinji is I am going to beat the shit out of you.' She strained under the weight of her baggage, barely managing to carry the colossal weight. Finally, she began to follow the bald man.

True to his word he was carrying the sign above his head. All around people turned to look at it. Then they began to search around frantically. Many, if not all, found Asuka and knew it was her. Very quickly she was surrounded by people asking her for autographs and questions.

But Asuka continued walking. She desperately needed to talk to these people, to sign their baby's heads, and to make money. Unfortunately she could not.

Not only could she not talk under the strain of carrying her bags but the bald man continued to walk. Asuka was not going to let him get away. She began to push herself faster, further so that she could keep up with him. Ignoring all those people was surely one of the hardest things she had ever done.

But she was not going to let Shinji get away without giving him an apology. That was what pushed her on.

Finally, near the back of one of the garages they reached the car. Most of the people following her had long since given up, but those that stayed with her took one look at the car and changed their ideas.

"No way one of the world's saviors would ride in that!" said one elderly woman, jerking a bony finger at the junker sitting in the corner. Asuka's public began to walk away.

She only restrained herself from calling out to them by the width of a fingernail. 'Let them think it isn't you,' she finally thought, 'less embarrassment later. They'll think it was just a false sighting.'

The bald man popped the trunk and Asuka dumped her things into it. With a vicious sigh she collapsed into the back seat of the car. The man began driving.

Asuka had already had the whole flight to think about why Rei was helping her. Her mind didn't need to dwell on it more during the car ride. She simply zoned out.

------

"Wake up," the bald man said to Asuka. She yawned and sat up in her seat, taking stock of the bald man.

"What?" she asked.

"Get out," he commanded, "We're here."

Asuka jumped out of the car, expecting to see Rei anywhere. Instead her eyes took in a park on the outskirts of the city. She looked around, confused. 'Why would Rei want to meet here?' she thought.

Her question was answered with the squealing of tires and a yelled, "So long sucker!" from the bald man.

Asuka collapsed onto her knees. The pavement hurt her slightly, but she was beyond feeling it. "Why Rei?" she said out loud.

"Why what?" said a semi-familiar voice. Asuka turned to find Rei standing twenty feet away, head cocked to one side.

Asuka jumped up, relieved at finding Rei here. "I thought you ditched me," she said, exasperated.

"Why would I ditch you?" Rei asked, walking towards Asuka slowly.

"I don't know," Asuka said, turning her head away and closing her eyes to show her embarrassment.

Rei reached Asuka. "Look at me pilot Soryu," she said calmly. When Asuka didn't turn to face her Rei reached out her left hand and put it on Asuka's chin. She lightly pulled Asuka so that she turned to face Rei. Asuka opened her eyes and looked into Rei's.

She still didn't have enough time to avoid the right handed slap Rei delivered. Asuka did a full 360 degree turn from the force of the impact on her cheek. She found herself looking at Rei again, teeth slightly less secured then they'd been before. "Why did you hurt him?" Rei asked without a hint of anger in her voice.

A tear let loose from one of Asuka's eyes, sliding down her scared and bewildered expression. "I didn't mean to…" she said weakly.

"Just as I didn't mean to hurt you?" Rei said, in the same cold voice.

"No dammit," Asuka shouted, rage entering her voice, "You stupid doll! I didn't mean to hurt him as in I didn't want too!"

Rei's face remained the same, as did her voice. "I did not want too hurt you either, yet I still did it intentionally," she said.

Asuka froze for a moment, considering the words. 'So I really didn't want to hurt Shinji?' she thought. Well that was good at least.

"You have hurt him badly Soryu," Rei said, turning to walk away. "For this you have my unending contempt," she said over her shoulder.

"Wait," Asuka said, taking a step forward, "Isn't there some way I can prove to you that I really do want to apologize to him?"

Rei stopped and did not move for several seconds. Finally, she turned and looked into Asuka's eyes across the ten feet separating them. "You still don't get it, do you?" Rei said unapologetically.

"Get what?" Asuka said, putting on her most confused expression.

"That you are of no importance," Rei said. Asuka nearly choked on the amount of spit in her throat. As it was, she gagged. "Even now," Rei continued, "when I am trying to have an important conversing with you, you act like you are important."

Asuka was almost done denying it when she stopped. 'Alright,' she admitted to herself, 'I was acting. Move on and prove to Rei you need to see Shinji.' "I'm not denying it anymore," she said.

Rei narrowed her eyes slightly. "That's not good enough," she said.

"What do I have to do?" Asuka demanded with real humility in her voice.

'That will help you,' Rei thought. "First, you will repeat after me," she said.

"Fine," Asuka said without any hesitation.

"I am worthless."

"I am worthless.

"Shinji is important to people, I am not."

"Shinji is important to people, I am not."

"My fans only like me because I am new and exciting. With time that will fade."

Not fully understanding why Rei was having her say this one Asuka said, "My fans only like me because I am new and exciting. With time that will fade."

"People care for Shinji. They do not want to see him hurt. If you ever hurt him again, I will kill you."

Asuka repeated the first two lines of the final set, thinking Rei did not want her to say the last one. When Rei made a continue gesture Asuka did not even blink. "If you ever hurt him again, I will kill you," she finished.

Rei nodded.

Asuka smiled, believing that the quiz was over. She was wrong, it was just beginning.

Over the next hour Rei did numerous things. She taught Asuka on important things, like how blue was better then red. She made Asuka recite oaths. Asuka was asked questions on her every action around Shinji. Her feelings where questioned at every turn. Rei literally ripped her soul out and looked at it.

Finally Rei seemed to have had enough. "We are done here," she said.

Misunderstanding Asuka took an angry step forward. "You ask me all those questions for hours, then just say its over," she snapped, "like that?"

Rei nodded. "You told me the truth," she said.

Asuka leaned her head to one side and wrinkled her forehead. "Told the truth?" she asked.

"Yes," Rei said, "You proved to me that you can be honest with someone. Even someone you don't like."

"Well what does honesty have to do with it?" Asuka said.

"Everything," Rei explained, "You lied to Shinji when you said you loved him before. Now that you are willing to be honest you will never have to lie to him like that again. That means no more excuses if you do hurt him," Rei finished warily.

Asuka thought about it for a moment. 'Makes sense,' she thought, 'either I'm truthful to Shinji with my feelings or she gets to kill me. Win win for her.' Something else occurred to her. "How do you know I'm being honest?" she asked.

"I reviewed NERV's file on you during your flight," Rei said, "I knew the answers before you gave them. All it took was you to not lie. Congratulations Pilot Soryu you passed."

Asuka sighed as she realized how simple it had all been. She also took mental stock of how big NERV's file on her must have been. 'Oh well,' she thought, 'its past now.' "Where is he?" Asuka asked.

"The place you called him at," Rei riddled, "but he did not answer."

It was no mystery to Asuka. "Thank you Rei," she said.

"Prove me wrong Pilot Soryu," Rei said, "prove that you will not hurt Shinji. Prove that I was not wrong to tell you where he is. Prove to me that it is a good thing I did not kill you the moment I saw you."

Asuka set off, slightly expecting a bullet in the back.

------

Before anyone asks, tête-à-tête means head to head.

One more chapter planned at this point, although I am now trying to think of ways to add on to this. I should be able to get out at least another chapter tomorrow, do more planning, and maybe even get another one out. Thanks, everyone, for even more reviews.


	8. ReConcile

Rivalitas

Chapter 7: ReConcile

------

The house was unlit, even thought nightfall was coming on fast. The land around it was open, at least the land close to it. On the outskirts was a forest and who knew what else. Several fences signified that some sort of livestock might have been kept here at some point.

Or it just might be to keep other people out.

Other people like Asuka. The first fence she had to climb over took her nearly five minutes. Her dress got caught on a loose nail and she nearly fell off the fence.

The next fence she decided to go under. That got her face and clothes covered in dirt. She stood and dusted herself off calmly, not worrying about her appearance for the first time in a long time. 'Shinji won't care about that,' she told herself, 'It'll be words that are important tonight.'

The next two fences she decided to slip through, risking both falling and getting dirty. She didn't care. She'd long since decided it was worth it. Finally, she reached the house. Tentatively, she knocked on the door with three strokes.

Shinji stood up from his position slumped on the couch. He wiped the sleep and tears stains from his eyes. Whoever was at the door, he didn't want to let them know he had been crying. He grabbed a shirt and a pair of pants and threw them on casually. 'No point in getting dressed up,' he thought.

Shinji had come here almost immediately after coming back to Japan. During his flight he had called Misato, Rei, and, needing someone else to talk too, his father. While Misato had given him plenty of feedback on the situation Rei and his father hadn't. Rei had given a simple, "It will all work out," and Gendo had barely even said anything more then grunts.

It hadn't helped his spirits much.

So he'd gone back to his teacher's, one of the few places he actually felt belonged. In the three days since the incident, all he'd done was think about it. The only conclusion he could come up with was that he had been right.

What else could he come up with?

Shinji, being Shinji, came up with quite a few different scenarios involving it being his fault. Some wouldn't have made any sense to a less traumatized mind. A few seemed rooted in insanity. But there where a few that he worried might really be true.

Still, in the end he had decided that it was Asuka's fault. She had been the one who lied, the one who hadn't meant it when she said she loved him. 'But,' he thought as he went to get the door, 'when she wants to apologize… I'll listen.' He was kind hearted like that.

He was also good at making thoughts at exactly the wrong time.

Shinji pulled open the door, turning to make sure that the doorstop would hold it open. When he turned back to look at his guest his breath was nearly stolen away.

Their eyes locked and starred into each other for what seemed like a long time. Shinji's jaw was dropped; Asuka had a small, hopeful smile on her face. 'Well,' she thought, 'it's going good so far.'

Well, thinking like that, what should she expect?

Shinji turned and began to walk into the house slowly. His feet suddenly felt very unsteady beneath him. It felt like he'd just ridden a bucking bronco for several hours and was now trying to walk away from it. The couch seemed very inviting as he collapsed onto it.

Asuka took his walking, not running away, to mean that she could answer. She took a few steps in and then stopped. Glancing around her she didn't believe that Shinji had lived here. Pizza boxes, dirty clothes, and cans littered the entrance hall. 'But Shinji was always so clean,' she thought, 'so what happened?'

Closing the door behind her, she continued into the living room. It looked strikingly familiar to the entrance hall, but with what seemed to be a pair of couches in it. Shinji was sprawled out on one of them.

Asuka crossed to the couch across from Shinji's. She looked at it thoughtfully. Finally she dusted it off with her hands and sat down. She turned to look at Shinji.

He had his eyes closed, with one arm over his forehead. His feet were up on one end of the couch, with his head at the other. His other arm was loose, drifting down to the floor and resting there.

'Not the greatest posture for talking,' Asuka thought, slightly irritated, 'but then I don't think he exactly plans to listen at this point.'

"Shinji," she began, hoping to get his attention. She clasped her hands in front of her and turned her head so she wasn't looking directly at him. "I came here to apologize," she finished with her voice still going strong.

She waited for him to react in some way. They only action he really started to do was to trace a small circle into the carpet, using his loose hand. Asuka took a deep breath, deciding that she would need to get it all out at once.

"I'm sorry for treating you like you where worthless," she said, "and I'm sorry for trying to use you for personnel attention. That was cruel and I never should have even thought about it."

Shinji lay still.

Asuka plunged on in her apology. She had had a long time to think about it, and she knew everything she needed to say. "I'm sorry I got caught up in all the hype, that I left you in Japan, and that I wasn't willing to consider giving up all the unnecessary attention for you. But most of all," she said, leaning forward and her voice becoming strained, "I'm sorry I hurt you."

Shinji opened his eyes so he could look at Asuka. Because his hand was over his forehead Asuka could not look into his eyes, but he could look into hers. 'Sincerity?' he judged, 'and are her eyes clouding up a little?'

His thoughts drifted back to all the Asuka's he had known. First there was the loud, bossy Asuka who would not let him in. Then, later, she'd become too sad to deal with. After that she'd evolved to a nicer one, just after instrumentality had been finished. The next one was seemingly the same as the last, but was really a fake, attention craving Asuka. Now he had this one, who appeared to be sincere and sad. What where the odds she wasn't just acting again?

And how long would she stay subdued like this? Wasn't it just a matter of time until another Asuka took over and just tried to use him again? No, he would not fall for this again.

"No," he said, "I will not accept this. You are just trying to use me again."

Asuka sat back slightly. "Why do you think I'll do that again?" she asked, "Don't you trust me?"

"Not after last time," Shinji said, standing up and beginning a slow walk to the doorway, "Not after you lied when you said, "trust me". I can't believe this is true, and I won't let you hurt me like this again. Besides, you never apologized for what was really important," he reached the doorway and stopped. "Why does trust equal suffering?" he asked no one in particular. Then he continued walking out of the room.

Asuka bowed her head. She had failed in her moment of near triumph. What was she to do now?

Pieces of Shinji's speech began to filter through her head. 'You never apologized for what was really important' she remembered him saying, 'what did he mean by that?' She sat back on the couch pondering what he must have meant.

'What are you doing?' screamed a part of her brain, 'Are you just going to let him get away again!'

With a start she realized that Shinji had really left the room. She looked around in all directions before jumping up and walking out of the only exit to the room. Her head whipped around in all directions, searching for any sign of where Shinji might have gone. She heard a soft click.

'The front door,' she realized, before heading straight for it. She exited the house and looked around. Already some distance away a brown covered head was bobbing away from her. 'Stop!' she thought. Asuka began running to catch up to Shinji.

No way would she just let him get away like this. Not for the second time in only three days. She charged after him.

Maybe he saw her, maybe he didn't, either way he started walking faster, then eventually running. The path he ran on was well worn and could be done quickly. It wasn't very long either, especially when he ran it. He'd done this many times before.

Asuka lost sight of him from time to time. He would go around a bend in the trail, or just drop out of sight for an instant. 'Stupid Shinji,' Asuka thought, 'he's always running away!'

Finally Shinji reached his destination. He stopped his run and took a look out in the dim light.

Asuka hadn't been able to see him stop. Shinji had gone around a corner just before stopping. When Asuka came around the corner Shinji heard her, turned around, and was run over.

They both fell into the water, sending ripples out in all directions. It was a minute before either one of them managed to stand in the shallow water. They both stood and looked themselves over, before turning to look at the other.

They where both in dirty, soaking wet clothes that they'd been wearing for far too many days. The dim light, combined with the being wet, gave them both the impression that the other was crying. It also gave them the realization that the other was sad.

"I'm sorry for saying I love you without thinking about what it meant," Asuka said finally. It was exactly what Shinji had needed to hear.

The both walked out of the water, clothes heavy from the amount of water in them. Neither would admit it but they both cast quick glances at each other. Just enough to make sure that the other was still there.

They began ringing out their clothes, continuing the quick glances. Soon they where no longer weighed down by the huge amounts of water, although more from dripping off then ringing out. Finally their eyes met.

They starred into each other for a long moment. Then Shinji sighed. "You're making it real hard to stay angry at you," he said, "you know that?"

Asuka gave a small smile. "Yeah," she said. She glanced out across the pond, taking in the water, the moon, and the moon's reflection. "Shinji," she gasped, "this is beautiful."

He turned to look with her. "I know," he said, "I'd wanted to show it to you. Back before."

"Back before when?" she had to ask.

"Before you went back to Germany," he said, "I found it up here when I came to stay with my teacher for a few days."

'He planned it that long ago?' she thought, slightly shocked. "Why didn't you?" she asked.

"I don't know," he said, taking a seat and leaning backwards on his hands, "Just the whole name leaking thing sort of threw it off."

Asuka sat next to him, cross-legged though. "Did they ever catch who did that?" she asked.

Shinji shook his head. Asuka turned back to facing the pond, looking across it and around it. She leaned back, putting her hand back to support her.

It landed on something not all together unfamiliar.

Both teens looked, in awe, at their hands. Asuka's on top of Shinji's. Then they turned to look at one another.

"Asuka," Shinji began.

"What?" she asked.

"How do I know that you aren't just faking it again?" he asked, "how do I know you aren't just doing this for yourself?"

"How do I know that you aren't just faking it?" Asuka returned. She answered her own question for him, "Because I trust you," "And while I know I don't deserve it sometimes," she said, continuing, "I hope that you can learn to trust me."

Shinji paused to consider her words. 'Trust her?' he thought, 'she was right when she said she didn't deserve it…still.'

"If you ever lie to me or try to use me like that again," Shinji said, with an emphasis on ever, "I will leave you. Understand?"

Asuka nodded without any hesitation. "No," Shinji said, "I want you to actually think about it before you say yes."

Asuka paused and considered it. 'Never trying to use him I can do,' she thought, 'but never lying at all? Even if it's for his own good or something like that?'

She actually spent several minutes thinking about it. Finally, "I can promise to never try to use you," she said truthfully, "but never lying, even a little, will be near impossible. All I can promise for lying is to try."

Shinji smiled. "I'm glad to know you can think about something before you answer it," he said, "and I accept that you can't promise never to lie. I'm not sure I'd have ever believed you even if you did promise that." He put out his hand for her to shake.

'Screw that,' Asuka thought. She reached out, grabbed his hand and pulled him into a deep hug. Shinji awkwardly returned it.

Asuka released him from the hug and they both turned to look out at the pond again. Slowly, Shinji reached out his arm and rested it across Asuka's back, ending it on her far shoulder. After a moment she returned the gesture, but with her head resting on Shinji's nearer shoulder.

They remained that way for several more hours. Both of them sat there, simply enjoying each other's company and the sight of the moon reflecting off of the water.

------

**Out take**

Shinji smiled. "I'm glad to know you can think about something before you answer it," he said, "and I accept that you can't promise never to lie. I'm not sure I'd have ever believed you even if you did promise that." He put out his hand for her to shake.

'Screw that,' Asuka thought. She reached out, grabbed his hand and pulled him into a deep hug. Shinji awkwardly returned it.

Asuka released him from the hug and they both turned to look out at the pond again. Slowly, Shinji reached out his arm and rested it across Asuka's back, ending it on her far shoulder. After a moment she returned the gesture, but with her head resting on Shinji's nearer shoulder.

At this point Rei came out of her hiding point. Surprised Asuka and Shinji turned to look at her. "Rei?" asked Shinji, "What are you doing here?"

Rei gave a positively un-Rei-like smile and pointed at the pair of them. "You just got Punk'd," she laughed.

Ashton Kutcher and the film crew ran out, falling over themselves with laughter.

Asuka and Shinji's eyes where as big as saucers.

------

There's what I originally planned to be the ending. Expect at least one more chapter, at the very least telling you that I'm not going to write more. But probably more then that.

This officially had more hits then Reign of the Tabri, after only 7 chapters released. Thanks to everyone who has read it so far. You've really helped me get this out faster.

Reviews continue to come in and I continue to update pretty fast. They go hand in hand; anyone who's ever written knows that. Thanks to all reviewers, keep it up.


	9. Taking it to Mom

Rivalitas

Chapter 9: Taking it to Mom

------

Shinji and Asuka were both awakened in the early morning by the bird calls and bugs. Still, neither one of them really wanted to move. They were warm, secure in each other's embrace, and still groggy from sleeping.

Finally, Shinji made the first move. He stretched out his arm that wasn't holding Asuka and loosened it up slightly. Next he used it to clean the sleep out from his eyes. His head turned and took in Asuka dreamily. "So," he asked hopefully, "are we dating now?"

Asuka smiled slightly. "Stupid," she teased, "We've been dating for over three days now."

Shinji blinked in surprise. 'What?' he thought. Slowly the gears in his head began to turn. Eventually he remembered three nights before, when he had asked Asuka out. She had said yes…

"That counts?" he asked.

Asuka lifted her head up and nodded it calmly. "Yep," she said.

Shinji's face became slightly fearful. 'So this is dating,' he thought, 'the last three days. I wonder if it's always so emotionally scarring.' "Is it always filled with so much crying and apologizing?" he asked.

Asuka's smile grew even wider. "Not by the girl," she said.

'Great,' Shinji thought as he realized the great curse of men. "So now what?" he said. It seemed he could only ask questions today.

"I don't know," Asuka said, at a loss, "What do you want to do next?"

Shinji rubbed his chin and considered it. "We should probably change clothes," he said, gesturing at their still damp clothes.

"Sure," Asuka said, "then what?"

"Well…" he said.

Asuka leaned in to whisper something into his ear, "Misato will probably want to know."

Shinji nodded his agreement.

------

This found them, four hours later, at the apartment complex, both in a fresh change of clothes and smiling. Shinji knocked.

Misato opened the door and burped. This caused her to momentarily close her eyes. The first thing she saw when she reopened them was Asuka.

"You!" she shouted, pointing at Asuka.

"It's okay," Shinji began to explain.

Misato looked at Shinji and blinked. 'Both of them here…' she thought, 'together?' Her mind scurried to put it together. "Uh… come in?" she said, still puzzling it out.

Shinji entered first, lightly pushing Misato out of the way so that the doorway was clear. Asuka followed warily.

Eventually Misato was all the way out of the way. She stood against the wall, still holding the door. Shinji blocked for Asuka as she entered.

Asuka decided any sudden movements probably wouldn't be a good idea. She kept her hands visible and sat down at the kitchen table. Shinji and Misato joined her shortly, Shinji next to her and Misato across. 'Caught in the middle,' Shinji thought, 'just like I always tried to avoid.'

"What's this about?" Misato said warily, "Last time I heard you where angry with her Shinji."

"We're done with that now," Asuka said. Misato gave her a hard look. Asuka scowled back.

"Maybe I should do the talking?" Shinji said to Asuka, putting his hand on her arm as if restraining her. She relaxed slightly. Misato made a smile as if she had just won a great victory.

Shinji turned back to face Misato. "She's right," he said.

Misato's jaw dropped. "Are you serious?" she demanded, "After the way she tried to use you like that you're just going to go back to being friends with her?"

'This is probably not a good time to tell her we're dating,' Shinji thought. He nodded to tell Misato she was correct. He said, "Asuka's changed Misato."

"In three days!" Misato exclaimed, standing slightly and gesturing at Asuka. "In three days she goes from trying to use you for money like a slut to you two being friends again?"

Shinji could only manage to squeak out a, "Yes."

Misato collapsed backwards into her chair and let out a sigh. "I need a beer," she said tiredly.

Shinji got up and got her one. Of course, he never turned his back on her. He didn't trust her to not kill Asuka yet. Misato was just overly protective of Shinji sometimes. Fortunately for Asuka, Shinji could be as well.

Misato popped the top, took a drink, let out a watered down yell and then started barking orders. "Tell me exactly what happened," she said in between sips, "since the two of us last talked."

Asuka kept quite while Shinji reported on the previous days events. It was good Misato had asked Shinji, Asuka was seething in rage. 'She called me a slut!' she silently screamed, 'I am not a slut!' Shinji must have gotten some sort of message from Asuka because he talked fast.

Misato listened with an attentive ear, listening for any sign that Shinji had misunderstood something Asuka had said. Any sign that Asuka had lied in any way, any excuse to disembowel Asuka on the spot. Shinji gave her none.

Of course, there weren't really any reasons to give for that extreme of a response. But Misato did give a good purple nerple…

Shinji finished and let out a sigh. It was quite the mouthful to say all at once.

"You forgot one thing," Misato said, "How did Asuka know to find you at your teachers?"

Shinji opened his mouth to speak, only to realize that he didn't know that part. He turned to Asuka.

"Rei told me," Asuka said, "She called me right after I talked to you, Misato. She got me flown in here and then we talked, or should I say I was interrogated? She grilled me on everything Misato, everything."

Misato raised an eyebrow. "Everything," she asked.

"Everything," Asuka said with a nod.

Misato picked up her phone. "Then I guess you won't be worried if I call Rei and ask her a few questions," she said with a smile.

Asuka didn't bat an eyelash. "Go ahead," she said, leaning back in her chair, "It doesn't bother me in the least."

Misato got up and walked out of the kitchen, putting the phone to her ear.

"You told Rei how much?" Shinji asked.

Asuka sighed. "My whole life story," she said, resting her chin on the table in a depressed sort of way, "Everything I'd ever done. She back checked it to NERV and knew I hadn't lied."

"Why would you just tell Rei everything?" Shinji said. 'Now big of files do they have on us?' he thought, catching that part only barely.

Asuka pouted. "It was the only way to get to you and I was desperate. Besides, she caught me off guard. It wasn't like I exactly expected to have someone quiz me on my whole life, or even try for that matter."

Shinji patted her on the back and smiled. "You did the right thing," he said, "Everything's going to work out now. Misato will come around eventually."

"Easy for you to say," Asuka sat up in her chair, "You didn't have to tell Wundergirl your life story."

Shinji shrugged and was about to say something else when Misato returned. She looked a mixture of relieved and annoyed. "Everything checks out," she said calmly, "but that doesn't mean I won't forget this soon Asuka."

Asuka eyed Misato warily, expecting the response to change in any of ten different ways. It went in option number four's.

Misato's face turned to a more teasing one. "So you two were having make-out sessions here when I was gone?" she said, putting an emphasis on were as if she'd always suspected it.

Shinji blushed and slid lower in his chair. Asuka scowled and started yelling at Misato. Misato returned with more teasing about Asuka's past. "Shinji," she teased, "did you know Asuka has dreams about you?"

'Just like good times,' Shinji thought from under the table. Asuka fired a retort, only to be interrupted by the door bell ringing. 'Now who?' thought Shinji.

Misato shouted, "Did you know how little a picture set of her was selling for? Eight hundred dollars! A set of me is worth more then that!" over her shoulder as she went to get the door.

Asuka soon joined Shinji under the table.

------

The story continues. I got a few more chapters planned before an ending that will hopefully be satisfying. I gotta admit though, I am worried that I won't be able to continue this as well as the first part.

Reviews continue to fly in and I continue to live up to my promise. This is the second chapter today and you can expect another tomorrow. A permanent ending by Friday. Thanks for letting me know how you felt about the chapters, it has been a great help. Reviewers kick ass.


	10. I've loved you

Rivalitas

Chapter 10: I've loved you...

------

Misato entered the kitchen with another pair of feet. "Who do you think it is?" Asuka whispered to Shinji underneath the table.

She mustn't have whispered quiet enough because the other pair of feet leaned down so that their owner was looking at Shinji and Asuka. Rei's hair looked interesting upside down.

She blinked twice and then said, "Why are you under the table?"

Shinji and Asuka slowly got out from under the table and resumed their seats. Misato took her seat and Rei sat across from Shinji. Asuka scowled slightly when she saw she was sitting next to Rei. Shinji let out a small sigh and thought, 'I guess I can't protect her from both of them.'

"Um," Shinji began, "So why are you here Rei?"

"Am I not supposed to be?" she asked, confused.

"Well, it's not that," Shinji stuttered, "It's just that we don't know why you are here. Did Misato tell you to come when she called you?"

Rei nodded and Misato smiled. "Yep," Misato said, "I told her she might as well come see you guys."

What followed was a small, slight awkward silence. Shinji nodded slowly and consistently. "So…" he said, breaking the silence.

"…yeah…" Asuka said, looking at Rei and waiting for her to say something.

Finally Rei decided to speak and break the awkwardness. "It is good to see that the two of you have worked out your problems," she said, "Tell me, are you now … dating?"

"No," Misato said, genuinely believing it was true.

Asuka and Shinji looked at each other. 'Oh what the hell,' Asuka thought. She nodded and Shinji returned it with a little bit slower nod. They both turned to Misato and Rei and said, "Yes." Synch training always would come in handy like that.

Misato's jaw dropped and Rei gave a small smile. "I am happy for you," Rei said calmly. Misato downed another beer.

"How?" she said, paralyzed in most of her body from the shock, "I try for nearly a year to get something from the two of you and now, less then a month after you move out, you're dating! And right after a big fight like that!"

Shinji and Asuka looked at each other again. Then they returned to facing Misato and said, "Yeah" and "Yep". Synch training, after all, couldn't always be perfect.

Misato put her head down on the table and began to go to sleep. Five beers in five minutes would do that to you, and would even work on Misato. 'Kids these days!' she thought before she went under.

Asuka and Shinji both turned to look at Rei, wondering if she had anything else to say. Rei continued to look at Misato, wondering if she was ever going to get up. Slowly, Rei lifted a finger and reached it out to poke Misato in the arm. Just before she contacted Shinji grabbed her hand. Rei turned back to looking at him and blinked. Shinji shook his head and then jerked it in the direction of the living room. Asuka understood and got up to leave the room.

Shinji had to pull Rei by her finger that he was still holding onto. Twice Rei tried to pull back and go poke Misato. Both times Shinji stopped her.

Finally they all made it to the living room. Asuka plopped down on the couch and Shinji sat next to her. Rei stood in front of the couch. "What did you wish to speak about?" she asked.

Asuka scowled. "How much did you tell Misato?" she demanded angrily.

"Everything she asked about," Rei responded.

"Well how much did she ask about Wundergirl?" Asuka demanded louder.

Rei paused to consider it. "Everything," she said with a nod.

"How can you tell a whole life story in five minutes?" Shinji asked, "Misato couldn't have been gone longer then that!'

"Major Katsuragi seemed to know most of the story already," Rei said, "I just had to fill in the last few weeks and anything she didn't know."

Shinji let out a sigh and nodded. "Well," he said, "I guess I have a question for you then Rei."

"What is it?" she asked.

"Why did you tell Asuka where I was? When I told you I was going to my teacher's house I asked you not to tell anyone else," Shinji said. He hadn't been hurt by it, but he easily could have been.

"At first I thought not to," Rei said, "My plan was too simply leave her somewhere. But Gregory dissuaded me from that. He suggested I-"

"Hold on a sec," Asuka said, holding her hands in a timeout gesture, "Who's Gregory?"

Rei blinked. "Oh," she said, "I forgot you do not know him. He is a photographer… and my boyfriend."

Eyes bulged, jaws dropped and thoughts flew in all directions. 'How naïve is she!' Asuka thought. Shinji's was along the lines of, 'If he'd using her I'll kill him!'

Rei blinked again and asked, "Was it something I said?"

"Rei," Asuka said, "Let me get this straight. You're dating your photographer? How old is this guy! And how do you know he isn't just trying to use you?"

"Not my photographer," Rei said, "A photographer. He is very nice, and my age. He takes pictures of the world, not of people. I think you would like to meet him Shinji," she scowled and finished with a hint of venom, "And I know he is not using me because he is not like you Pilot Soryu."

Shinji calmed slightly and Asuka rolled her eyes and sighed. "So, go on then Rei," Shinji said.

"Well, as I was saying, Gregory convinced me not to just leave Asuka someplace. It was his idea to use NERV's files to reverse interrogate Asuka. You have him to thank for that Pilot Soryu."

"Thank you Gregory," Asuka said sarcastically.

"I'll be sure to tell him you said that Pilot Soryu," Rei said calmly.

'If this guy will go out with Rei,' Asuka thought, 'she had better never let him get away.'

"So when do we meet him?" Shinji asked calmly.

Rei gave a soft smile and said, "Eventually."

Shinji sighed and lay back on the couch. 'This might turn into a long day,' he thought. A part of him envied Misato, already asleep.

"Well," Rei finally said, "I have to go see Gregory now." She got up and left the room, leaving Asuka and Shinji alone.

'She's going to go see him now?' Shinji thought, 'Why couldn't we just have gone with her to meet him now?'

"Shinji," Asuka said.

"Huh?" he said, recovering from being lost in his thoughts, "What?"

"What do you think?" she asked him, snuggling closer on the couch.

"Well, Misato took it better then I expected actually. And it was nice to see Rei," he said.

"Humph," Asuka said, smarting slightly that he'd been glad to see Rei, "Well I think you owe me one now."

"What for?" Shinji asked.

"Putting up with Wundergirl, of course," Asuka said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Shinji sighed. There was no denying it now. Of course, it wasn't like he hadn't been looking forward to it… "Dinner?" he offered.

"That'll make up for it," she said with a smile.

"Fine," Shinji agreed, "You move Misato to her room and I'll cook."

Blood drained from Asuka's face when she realized how drunk Misato was. She would definitely get bonked on the head once by Misato in her drunken stupor. Still, Shinji's cooking was good…

"Agreed," she said.

------

Dividers...hm

Final chapter tomorrow. I have it, and a prologue, all planned out. I just hope it's well received.

Thanks to all reviewers and readers. But mostly the reviewers. Always glad to hear from anyone, about anything. If it raises the review count I'll read it. You can even expect a return about it.

Hope that answered all the Rei questions well enough.


	11. for a long time

Rivalitas

Chapter 11: …for a long while now

------

Asuka confronted the massive weight before her with narrowed eyes. 'Alright beast,' she thought, 'you are going down!' She launched her assault.

She began by attempting to grab Misato around the waste. That didn't work because her arms slid down Misato's beer belly until they were more around her legs then her stomach. Asuka scowled and tried again.

She grabbed Misato around the ankles and pulled. Misato didn't even budge. 'How can she weigh this much and still look like that?' Asuka thought. Third time was the charm…

------

Shinji found the good china and began laying it out for the meal. Finished with that, he turned back to his dinner that was nearing completion. He grabbed a few things off of the spice rack and began throwing them on in his own fashion.

'Three more minutes and that will be done,' he thought. Now it was time to look for bonus points. Where would Misato keep candles?

Shinji knew the kitchen like the back of his hand. They wouldn't be in there, but might be in the storage closet. If they weren't there then Misato wouldn't have any.

He crossed out of the kitchen and into the hallway. He reached the seldom used closet next to Misato's room and opened the door.

There were candles; they were just almost all the way burned down. 'Misato must have had these for a long time,' Shinji thought, 'I don't know any reason why she would have used them recently.' He grabbed them anyway, taking three.

Back in the kitchen, he put the candles on the table, grabbed a lighter and lit them. He calmly turned, turned off the flames, and removed his dish from the stove top. "Asuka," he said, "dinner's almost ready." He placed the main dish on the table and began gathering his pair of side dishes and pouring the drinks.

He momentarily paused when he saw Asuka walk by, dragging Misato by her hair. He cringed slightly and then brightened when Asuka flashed him a smile. 'At least she figured out how to move her,' he thought. It was funny to think that Asuka and Misato had both been in the room while he was cooking. He'd been so caught up in it he hadn't noticed them. Oh well.

He finished setting everything up just in time for Asuka to enter. He smiled at her and she returned it. Shinji turned off the lights so that they would be eating by candlelight. They took their seats.

"Looks good," Asuka said happily.

Shinji enjoyed the compliment and said, "Thanks."

They dug in, both reaching for the main dish at the same time. Their hands connected and they both laughed nervously. Both of them decided that they would start with a side dish.

They both reached for the side dish and their hands connected again. This time the laughter wasn't as nervous, if felt realer to both of them. "Darn synch training," Asuka said after she stopped chuckling.

"Yeah," Shinji said, now reaching for the second side dish. This time Asuka waited for him to reach it before she reached for the main dish. They both served themselves and began eating happily.

'Come on Shinji,' he thought, 'think of something to think about!' His mind searched frantically for something to make the dinner more interesting. "Is it good?" he asked.

"Yeah," Asuka said in between bites. She was also trying to think of something for them to talk about. She wanted something long and interesting, that they would both enjoy.

Both of their thoughts spiraled until they both settled on the same thing. Each other.

"So," Shinji began, "what are you going to do about the whole attention thing?" He needed to know this before he could really begin to talk openly with her.

Asuka thought about it for a moment. She didn't want to say this just to make Shinji feel better, she really believed it now. Her expression became serious. "All my life," she said, "I've thought I needed a lot of people to pay attention to me."

Shinji took a bite but kept his eyes glued on Asuka, intent on what she was saying.

"But recently, with your help," she said smiling at him for a moment before returning to the serious expression, "I've come to realize that it isn't quantity that matters. It's quality." She smiled at Shinji and he smiled back while she finished speaking, "And I've realized that I don't need attention from the media and the paparazzi. I've realized that I want to be loved by one person, really deeply."

It was everything Shinji needed to hear, with just one thing missing. If she would just say his name, he'd be unbelievably happy. But she hadn't.

He looked back at his meal. 'Asuka's realized that she wants to be loved by one person,' he thought, 'but is it me that she wants to be loved by?' He couldn't bear not knowing any longer.

"Asuka," he said, lifting his head to look at her, his expression unbelievably serious, "do you love me?"

Asuka blinked in surprise. 'He looks so serious like that,' she thought. 'And he asked so openly. Subtlety is a dead art,' she decided. She knew that she could not joke around with this, there needed to be an answer. To seal the rift between the two of them… or it might tear it wider.

But she didn't want to grow further away from Shinji. Reviewing the last few weeks she felt a recurring emotion that had been there the whole time. She hadn't known how to identify it really, but it had been there for a really long time. But how long had the emotion been there? And how come she couldn't identify it?

Asuka began back-tracking her life. The unknown feeling had been there since Germany. She knew it had increased when Shinji had gone to his teacher's. What had been before that?

She found where it started, instrumentality. It had begun all the time back then. Just after the hardest times of her life, the feeling had begun. Now she knew how long it had been there.

But what was it? 'Anger? Pride? Happiness? Sadness?' she ran through a list of emotions. She wondered if she had ever felt this particular emotion before.

Yes, she had. Just not this concentrated.

She couldn't feel anything for her father besides contempt now, but there had been a time when she had felt this for him. Back when mama was alive. Come to think of it, she had felt this for mama as well. 'And one other,' she thought in stunned realization.

Kaji, just a little bit. Hell, barely at all. Not even as much as for her papa or mama. 'That really was just a crush,' she thought.

And with that came more realization. If she'd felt this for Kaji, a small crush, and her parents then it could almost only be one thing. 'Have I been that unloved,' she thought, 'that I can't even recognize love when I feel it?'

But she had felt it much more recently then for her mama, papa, or Kaji. She had felt it for Shinji, and much more concentrated then she'd ever felt it before. 'I love Shinji Ikari more then I ever loved anyone else,' she thought. It felt good to have finally thought that. Now how to put it all into words…

"Shinji," she began, starring into his still serious face, "I've come to a realization. Here, right now."

Shinji scooted his chair backwards slightly, fearing what he thought he would hear. 'She doesn't love you!' his mind screamed at him, 'She's just mocking you again you worthless piece of trash! Why would someone as great as her love you?'

Even fearing what he would hear, he feared even more not hearing it. It would've been far worse to never get an answer then to get a no. His every thought became consumed with what Asuka was saying. He would not run away from this.

"I think that when I said that I loved you, back in Germany," her voice shook as she said it, as if she was surprised at her findings. She stopped, considering her words carefully.

"If you could've seen inside my head," she said, "You would've seen that I really thought I was lying. My thoughts were wild; I didn't consider what I was saying. I just said it without thinking about it."

Shinji nodded. He'd long since realized that Asuka hadn't meant it at that point. What he needed to know was whether she loved him now. "Asuka," he interrupted, still fearful, "What does this have to do with now?"

Asuka looked up at him, her head having lowered to look at the food that was growing cold as she spoke, "Let me finish Shinji," she requested. Shinji wanted an answer. No, he needed an answer. He opened his mouth to speak again but Asuka interrupted him. "I'm getting to it," she said, smiling as she knew his personality so completely. He shut his mouth, restraining himself so that she could talk.

Asuka's smile faded so that she was being serious again. "Shinji," she said as she looked into his blue eyes, "I don't think I was really lying."

Shinji's face became confused. "What do you mean?" he demanded, "You just said that you didn't!"

"I said I thought I was lying," she answered. Shinji blinked and considered it. Asuka filled his thoughts for him, "I thought I was lying, but I was really being truthful. I loved you then Shinji, and I love you now. I just didn't realize it."

Shinji and Asuka both stopped to consider what had been said. It took a long time to sink in. Finally Shinji's thoughts reached a conclusion. 'She said she loved me,' he thought, 'the other part I can worry about later. This is enough for now.'

He broke out into a smile and Asuka followed him. Both of their breasts swelled with joy at the new found love. Shinji and Asuka felt something neither of them had felt for a long time.

The feeling of loving and being loved, at the same time reached out to both of them. It grabbed them and, lost in each other's eyes, would not let them go.

Slowly, both of their heads came closer and closer together. 'We're going to kiss,' they both thought. Neither was displeased with the possibility.

When their mouths were just inches from one-another, the candles went out, plunging them both into darkness.

------

I think this ending does the story justice. I hope everyone who reads this agrees with me on that.

This concludes my second story, but you can expect an epilogue within a couple of days. No, not tomorrow. I'm expecting it to be longer then the other chapters and therefore it might take longer.

Glad to hear from any and all reviewers at any time. Special thanks will be included with the next chapter, along with any needed explaining.


	12. Epilogue: It's a nice day to start again

Rivalitas

Epilogue: It's a nice day to start again.

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"Do you, Shinji Ikari, take this woman, Asuka Soryu, to be your lawfully wedded wife?" said the priest.

The church was not exactly one of the biggest in Japan. Therefore it was also not one of the biggest in the world. It was certainly not the place you would expect two of the world's saviors to be wed.

It was planned, at Shinji's pushing, to be a small ceremony. He'd originally wanted to have it be only their closest friends, but he'd given in to Asuka when she'd asked for a few others.

None gathered here would be described as enemies, although not all where exactly friends. One perfect example was the soon to be married couple's fathers.

They sat near the back, both quiet and apparently lost in thought. It had come as a shock to both of them, when their children had told them they were being married. Neither had expected their child to marry, let alone to one another. Neither parent regarded one another. They both sat, starring forward across the empty rows of seats. Their thoughts where complex, both of them being of Einsteinian minds. Not one person in the whole church could've read them. Fortunately, no one wasted their time trying to.

"I do," came across loud and clear from Shinji. There had been hesitation. Almost before the priest finished speaking Shinji had begun.

After the pair of fathers there were a great many rows of empty seats. No one knew why, nor cared why, the fathers of the too be wedded were sitting in the back. Everyone else continued to not waste their time trying to figure it out.

Besides the fathers in the back, only the front three rows were full. Jam packed full, but only those three rows. Only Shinji and Asuka's closest friends, and some relatives, had been invited. Rei and her boyfriend, Gregory, were sitting in the third row from the front, on the left side from the back of the church.

Rei was near crying, despite the fact that she did not know why. She always had hoped to be able to understand what made women cry at funerals, and now she did. She clutched Gregory close, thoughts spanning numerous topics.

'Is this what they will call the happiest day in their lives?' she thought. Rei searched for her happiest day and found it. The day she'd met Gregory. She clutched him closer.

Gregory let Rei grab on to him harder. If she needed it, he'd give it to her. Right now, all his attention was on Rei. She was the main reason he was there, despite the fact that he was now good friends with Shinji.

Shinji and Gregory had met over a year ago now, doing a double date with their respective girlfriends. The event had been rather enjoyable for Gregory, meeting the other two saviors of the world. It had been refreshing to see a couple in that much love, a love that Gregory now believed he felt for Rei. He'd have to ask her sometime if she felt it as well.

Rei and Gregory were not the only people in the third row, but they were the only people who were very close to Shinji and Asuka as friends. That is, if Rei could be said to be Asuka's friend…

"And do you, Asuka Soryu, take this man, Shinji Ikari, to be your lawfully wedded husband?" the priest said, turning to face Asuka.

In the second row, near the center of the right row of seats, Touji, Hikari, and Kensuke sat. They had all grown. None of them where the same as when Shinji and Asuka had first seen them. Multiple years of growing would do that to anyone.

Still, they were easily recognizable people to Shinji and Asuka. It wasn't as if they hadn't seen those changes happen gradually, rather then suddenly. Even people who hadn't seen them for a while could guess at who they were.

Hikari was crying into Touji's arms. 'Good thing I wore deodorant,' he thought, trying to keep his mind off of the ceremony as much as possible. Hikari had been right after all, he was the empathetic type. If he paid attention to the ceremony too much he'd end up crying with Hikari.

Not that she would've cared. She could feel, pressed up against Touji as she was, him twitching slightly. 'He can barely resist the sobs,' she thought. It brought a little more happiness to her heart. If she hadn't already been past normal levels of happiness she would've smiled. As it was, past those levels, she cried in happiness all the harder.

No, it wasn't Hikari that Touji was afraid to cry in front of. It was Kensuke. Well, mostly Kensuke. He wouldn't have been able to survive it himself if he'd cried at Asuka's wedding. That was plenty of reason not to cry.

Kensuke had the advantage of glasses. He could let a few tears shed without anyone even noticing. Although, like Touji, he would not let himself cry at Asuka's wedding. It was just one of those things that a man had to do.

Although it was only half Asuka's wedding…

No hesitation here either. Six years of dating had ironed out any sort of flaws when it came to this sort of a thing. "I do," Asuka said happily.

Directly in front of the pair of stooges and Hikari sat Misato. Unlike everyone else she didn't have the problem of being overcrowded. The tears gushing from her eyes kept everyone seated near her far enough away.

Misato had long since decided that the ceremony was beautiful. The church was perfect for the occasion. It was large enough for Asuka's preferences and obscure enough for Shinji's preference for the quiet.

The number of people invited also seemed perfect to Misato. She had no idea how many there were at the wedding, but it was the perfect number no matter what.

'It's been six years,' Misato reminisced through her tears, 'since they met. Time's moved so fast. It feels like just yesterday they were both dumped into my home.' And now they were being married in the perfect way.

"Then I pronounce you husband and wife," the priest announced happily.

The remaining guests where people of lesser importance in Shinji and Asuka's life. They were Shinji's teacher, and Ritsuku, and random relatives for the most part. Most were crying in different forms. All were happy in some way, even the two in the way back.

"You may kiss the bride," the priest said, stepping backwards and beaming happily. If this had been his favorite part, he wouldn't have been a priest.

The priest was a good man, someone Asuka and Shinji had known and trusted for some time. After dating for two years they'd agreed that they wanted religion in their life. One Sunday they'd just entered and begun learning the faith. Now, they were to be bound by it eternally.

Asuka and Shinji both moved into each other's embrace. The kiss begun like thousands of others had, but it quickly became something more meaningful. It was their wedding kiss after all.

'I will never forget this,' they both thought. If synch training had made their actions and words the same, loving each other for six years had made their thoughts the same. Now, connected in the kiss, they were one being. Neither wanted it to end, ever.

And it never would. After all, they were married now. They were now eternally in each other's presence, their souls never to be separated. And they liked it.

The kiss ended after both Asuka and Shinji opened their eyes. They saw in each other's eyes that it was time to move forward, past the physical part of the ceremony. They both knew it to be true.

They broke the kiss and turned to look at their friend's and family. 'There is one hell of a reception coming up,' they both thought happily. Neither could help but think of Gendo dancing. Giggling took them both as they exited the church. Pursued by their friends and family, it was all great.

And it was just the beginning of their life together, married at last.

------

Anyone heard of anyone writing an actual wedding before? I know there have been fics with the kids married, and a few where marriage comes up, but I don't think I've ever actually read a wedding. Let me know if there are any, I'd like to read them, just to make sure I did this right.

Well, this marks the end of this fic. Two down and I don't even know how many more in the future. I think the best part of both of them is that I've done over 90,000 words in five months. If nothing else, I'm fast with updates.

I'm happy with the number of reviews on this. I think I got a little group who looked forward to this and liked it. At the very least it had more reviews then Reign of the Tabri.

I know I said it after my first fic but I'm seriously going to take a break now. Nothing for at least a week or two, I have to get back into school. As for the next fic…

It will be something original, and hopefully with as interesting a plot as the last two, at the very least. It's gonna sort of mix the genres of the two of them, for the better or worse. If you liked either Reign of the Tabri or Rivalitas then please keep an eye out for it.

Now I reveal the name. Rivalitas is Latin. It translates into "rivalry (in love)". I think that is a lot of what AxS is all about. Their rivals in the anime, yet they begin to fall in love during this rivalry.

Thanks to everyone who reviewed this. I would give thanks to everyone who liked it, but no thanks to anyone who liked it but didn't let me know. I still have people who have alerts on this but haven't reviewed it. Thanks to everyone again, for what is surely the millionth time.


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